Gee, We're Stuck
by Takitwo
Summary: It was a harmless Valentines Day game to everyone except Hermione and her good ole foe. What's worse than being handcuffed to Draco for Hermione? Having your best friends give away the only key.
1. Edited: So It Begins

Disclaimer: Harry Potter does not belong to me.

It's the day of love and bunnies at Hogwarts; Valentines Day. No one really knew how this occasion came to start but they celebrated it anyway for the sake of the students who broke their brains studying all year. Teachers, students, Argus Filch and everyone else were busily swapping cards with over-sized hearts and plump "I love you's" written with bubble letters all throughout breakfast; everyone except Hermione Granger, the smartest one. She spent all night constructing her cards, putting sparkly glitters and gorgeous laces on them for the big day so she was still fast asleep in her dormitory. She was oblivious of owls swooping in and out of her room, dropping cards at the foot of her bed. All in all, she received nineteen good ones and one bad one which was from Draco Malfoy, the Slytherin God.

The Sleeping Beauty of Hogwarts awakened minutes after the last card was delivered. Her sight was blasted with dazzling cards from each of her dear friends and nemesis. She excitedly opened each one of them… Harry's, Ron's, Ginny's and everyone else in between. So far, her cards had the same message; Happy Valentine's Day! Love, Name here. At last, she came up to the last consecutive card, Draco Malfoy's. Hermione had second thoughts about reading it. _Why ruin my morning reading the nasty insults from a ferret?_ In the end, she couldn't bring herself to throw the card away so she read it… an action she regretted afterwards.

**You're probably wondering why I sent you a card.  
No fears, this won't change our bond so far.  
Reading these verses brings to you horrors unseen.  
But for the sake of your day I'll tell you.  
Your face will turn green.**

_With hate,  
Malfoy. _P.S. Bahaha, you read it, moron. Boy, you're in trouble.

Hermione scowled. Just perfect, she spent 10 seconds of her life reading pointless trash. She expected something like this from that obnoxious little pimple, Malfoy. She strolled towards the bathroom she shared with four other girls and stopped in front of the sink mirror. She opened the little cabinet behind it which contained the toothbrushes, but not before she had a blur of her reflection. _Wait a minute… _She closed the cabinet and saw a clear view of her face. She was green. She looked like the stereotype of aliens. All she needed now was an antenna and a flying saucer. What a cute little way to ruin her day.

"MALFOOOOOOOOOOOY!"

Her treacherous roar resonated throughout the empty halls of the castle and bounced into the Great Hall. Everyone knew who that was… clear as ice. Hermione seized her wand from her dresser and glided down the stairs with incredible speed. In no time, she was in front of the Great Hall doors. She cursed the door open, a door what would've been blasted to crap if it wasn't made magically and stepped in the hall. The sound of the door slamming on the wall shut everyone up. All attention was directed to Hermione. Some first years fainted and started convulsing at the sight of her with a green face, curlers, pajamas and a masterpiece assassin scowl on her face. She's a wild uncivilized barbarian at heart. Her wand was sending off little sparks like fireworks…

Her sharp eyes scanned the place for a certain platinum blonde guy.

"Malfoy!" she bellowed in front of the Slytherin table, "Come here or I'll be forced to hex the whole Slytherin house to the next apocalypse and watch all of you burn and undergo a very unpleasant painful experience!" Everyone close to Malfoy took the threat seriously and threw him out of the table and into Hermione's range.

"Blasted cowards," Draco muttered standing up. His gaze met Hermione's. He gingerly groped for his wand and proceeded to walking up to her. He couldn't wimp out now… not in front of the whole school. He glanced around the room for any signs of teachers who would have his back just incase he couldn't handle Hermione's magic. Oh, pooh. Not even Snape was there.

"Nice face, Granger," Draco said leering, trying not to show his fear. Hermione and her wand can do wonders if pushed to her limit. He was in fact proud of his work but scared of the consequences.

"YOU!" screeched Hermione as she grabbed his tie and pulled his face close to hers, "Reverse… the spell…" she snarled, "I swear, if you ruin my day, your suffering spirit will see your scarred body hanging by your neck in the owlery for the Hogwarts birds to peck and dismember."

Draco knew that voice meant Hermione's at the end of her thread. He knew damn well what Hermione and her wand could do. He just doesn't how to reverse them. He pulled his wand out of his pocket and waved it. Hermione's face turned regular.

"Fun's over?" Draco stated in a questioning manner. The hall was still deathly quiet. A first year coughed. Hermione glared at him. He fainted. Hermione let go of Draco's collar, mumbled something under her breath and marched straight to her dormitory to get dressed and look presentable. Draco walked back to his table to resume his breakfast but his fellow Slytherins started laughing; same with the other house tables. Soon enough, the hall was booming with rich laughter.

"What?" Draco asked irritably. He hated it when people kept things from him. A Slytherin conjured a full-length mirror in front of Draco. Draco had a white beard similar to the head master's, two rabbit ears, and a rabbit tail which looked like cotton balls glued together.

"GRANGER, YOU'LL PAY FOR THIS!"

Hermione heard his voice all the way to the Gryffindor tower.

"You don't mess with the Hex Queen," she whispered smiling.

* * *

Hermione, looking presentable, sat between Harry and Ron at their house table. She was just finishing her breakfast of waffles and pumpkin juice. Meanwhile, Ron and Harry were complimenting her previous experience with Malfoy.

"That was amazing! I was like… whoa, that's not Hermione," Ron rambled while putting more syrup on his pancakes and stuffing them in his mouth, "What kind of spell did you use anyway? I NEED to know."

"Ron! Pass me an orange," Harry said from Hermione's right side, "Herms, that was a bloody nifty spell. Was it the _Montralix_ curse?" A nod came from Hermione.

"Here ya go, Harry." Ron tossed an orange fruit towards his friend.

Draco was able to make his beard and rabbit ears vanish. But for some reason, his tail won't go away. It was unaffected by the spell that fixed the others. Thank Hermione for that twist. He tried to hide his tail with his robe but it just keeps on popping out and into view. There's no way he'd ask Hermione to get the tail off. _'Over my sexy dead body.' _While the students were waiting for the reason of their assembly in the hall, their robes magically turned bright red. This didn't happen last year at all. Then, the tables and benches flew, with the students and food on them, to the four sides of the hall, making a square like area with no corners touching. In the professor's tables, Dumbledore stood up and spoke to make the announcement of the month.

Dumbledore raised both of his hands and silenced every single student. "Listen, children, today is a very special Valentines Day. All of your classes are canceled AND there's going to be a game played. It's tradition that every 100 years, there will be students handcuffed together.

Every student's name will be in placed a container. They will be separated according to the year they're in and gender. We will then draw a piece of paper from the men's side for each year. This guy would be blindfolded and seated on a chair for the duration of the game. After that, we'll draw three pieces of paper from the ladies' side for each year. The blindfolded person is NOT allowed to know who these girls are. These ladies would be seated a couple of feet from the guy. A teacher will ask questions and the ladies will answer them using markers and boards. The guy will choose the answer that he prefers and the lady who gave that answer shall receive a point. By the end of the game, the girl who receives the most points will be handcuffed to this guy for the duration of the day."

Everyone was quiet. Leave it to the headmaster to come up with unearthly plans. But this time, it's not the headmaster's idea. It's all of the founders' minus Salazar.

Practically every girl wished they'd get picked with Draco Malfoy. Some had no chance since they're in different years. The others were blessed to be in the same year as him. As the game began, the teachers started to pick the guy's name. No one knows how and why but the name that came out was Draco Malfoy's… Students had different theories of why this happened; some thought that he was destined to sit on that chair. The most popular theory was that the relentless mind-chanting of his name in a girl's mind produced enough brainwaves for the unwavering wish to happen. As his name was called, a monstrous shriek came from the girl's side of the school clouding every sound existing. People said the world grew three sizes that day.

Dumbledore drew the first girl's name in the 6th year's side. Pansy Parkinson. When the Pansy, who wasn't paying any attention since she thought she had no chance, was tapped on the shoulder, she looked up from her notebook which was filled with Draco Malfoy's name. She found out she won.

"I WO-" Her mouth was immediately clamped my McGonagall's hand.

"Don't speak… at all. I know that may be a hard task to do but do your best. If he finds out it's you, you're eliminated," the headmistress said sternly, taking her hand off Pansy's mouth. Pansy's eyes widened with unconcealed horror.

"Oh my goodness, I swear I won't utter another word during the game since it has been my life long dream to be…" Her teacher's hand was on her mouth again. McGonagall smack her other free hand on her forehead and muttered a quick, "Why me."

The next girl was Parvati Patil's name. She didn't utter a word. She was still in a state of shock. She LOVED the guy. Her friends call it stalking since she's practically his tail, but she called it, admiration. Meanwhile, Draco was wondering who the girls were.

The last girl was the finest shock of all. Hermione Granger. Imagine her shock when she heard her name! She was petrified.

'_Oh dear, I've been picked. I've been picked… picked… picked… -Buzz- Brain… -buzz- shutting… -buzz- Picked… Picked… Malfoy... –crackle- Bzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz…-'_

"Urm, I think Herms is still sleeping… with her eyes open," Ron said clueless, waving a hand on Hermoine's face. Her eyes were blank and she looked as if her body had completely shut down. –Snap- Colin Creevey's camera flashed on her face.

The teachers pulled Hermione towards her chair. She hadn't reacted to the shock yet. She went along like a little girl. In the background, the school was cheering the loudest… especially the girls. Sure, they wanted to get picked, but they wanted to see what would happen with the rivals. After all, opposites attract.

Pureblood and Muggleborn.  
Slytherin and Gryffindor.  
Looks and Books.  
Wizard and Witch.

This should be interesting. While all of these comparisons were happening, Draco was wondering who the girl was… maybe, just maybe, she was the prettiest.

Meanwhile, the card Draco gave Hermione for Valentines Day flew out of the window and into some place, ready for the next idiot to read it.

* * *

There you go! Chapter One Edited. I personally think it's better than the last chapter. 


	2. Edited: Questions Part 1

Disclaimer: Harry Potter doesn't belong to me.

Chapter 2 Retype: Questionings Part 1

Time slowed, reality bent on and on the gamers went. Nothing's logical anymore. Time was six times slower, Draco was the center piece of a game, Hermione's brain stopped functioning, Slytherins were wearing red, and it was all too much. But then again… it WAS an unusual day with an unusual tradition taking place. No worries.

McGonagall gazed wearily at her list of students who played the game. All the other years were done except for 6th year. Their game was postponed until further notice. They were last because Hermione's brain was still malfunctioning. Luckily, it started running exactly one second after the 7th years were done playing. Theunhappy couple was Cho Chang and some unfortunate Slytherin guy. It was a sight really. The poor bloke tried to whack Cho with a broom stick after he found out it was her. But Cho, being a Ravenclaw, cursed him straight to the Hospital Wing.

The second someone detected Hermione's signs of life, she was seated to a chair along with the two other excited girls. Draco Malfoy was summoned from the room he was locked and blindfolded in. Severus Snape hastily dragged Draco by his shoulders out of the room. He could've levitated him, but the idea hadn't crossed his greasy little mind. While Snape was grudgingly dragging him, Draco was preoccupied with his own thoughts.

'_I _can't wait_ to get on that chair! I was _born_ for girls to fight over! And yes, yes, the whole beating Potter and Death Eater thing… too.'_ Draco thought. '_I wonder who the girls were. They'd better be worth my time. I do _not _deserve hideous girls. Wait… what if they chose Pansy for the contestants? What IF _**I**_ choose Pansy? That thought can scar me forever. No one deserves the faith of getting handcuffed to her! Except Potter and Weasley of course… oh well.'_

**Great Hall**

Everyone was assembled in the Great Hall waiting for Draco Malfoy to arrive. Parvati Patil and Pansy Parkinson were jittery like they drank three gallons of coffee... which they did. Hermione Granger on the other hand couldn't care less. She slouched on her furry armchair andcrossed her arms in front of her.

'_Wait a minute… no one should play this idiotic game when they don't feel like playing. In fact! No one should play this game at all! I'll put this game to a stop and save all those other people who shall play this, years from now! We should be studying, not wasting our time sitting here listening to love-sick girls chant some guy's name! _

"I AM—"

"Say another word and I'll fail you." McGonagall muttered from behind her.

"Mmm…" Hermione finished, bitterly.

After the dreadful waiting, Draco popped his head out of the door. The students erupted and the vibrations they caused could've triggered an ungodly earthquake. Hermione glowered at everyone. The students chanted Draco's name. Their voices soon merged into one, loud and indestructible sound. The chanting of his name made Draco feel cherished. Like he said, "Appreciated… as always." He can be very vain when he wants to. This is one of those times.

The headmaster hushed the student body with one wave of his old wrinkled hands. "I'm delighted to have everyone here to watch the last game for our tradition." He said. "I hope you enjoy it. Let it begin."

McGonagall placed the hair falling on her face behind her ears and read the first question from her long, brown, cracked parchment. "For the first question, _'What do you think of Draco Malfoy?'_ Write your responses on the board provided, please." The three girls looked on their parchments and jotted down quick answers.

Time passed.

"Okay. I shall now read the answers," said the headmistress. "From L. A., (Letter A (Pansy Parkinson)) 'I KNOW Draco is really, really, really, really, hot and really, really, really, cute and, and…'" McGonagall glanced at Pansy as if to say, 'What in the world…' The girl shrugged her shoulders. "'And really, really—' what the…okay. I'll stop now.

"From L. B. (Letter B (Parvati Patil)), 'I think Draco is the finest guy I've ever had the pleasure of meeting in my whole life. I just wish he'd notice and go out with me because I'm sure I deserve him and he deserves me.'"

The student body went "Aww," but Draco crinkled his face. It sounded a tad bit disgusting… Those words coming from an adult like McGonagall? Directed to him? The word 'pedophile' came to his mind… but it wasn't from her anyway so whatever.

"The last response, L. C. (Letter C (Hermione Granger)), 'Malfoy's brain, which functions unusually slower than most students, is a raisin which will probably shrivel and disintegrate soon enough along with his homosexual self... I've always wondered what strangling his neck feels like. I'm quite sure it would be pleasurable to do that.'"

Draco muttered a string of very rude words under his breath.

"Mr. Malfoy, please speak up a little," McGonagall requested, assuming Draco was muttering his answers.

"Mr. Malfoy, time to vote. Which girl would it be?" Dumbledore asked. Malfoy thought for a while.

_'Girl A talks too much…way too much,' he thought, 'Girl B, hmmm, she's okay I guess. But Girl C, Merlin's beard, she's ready to amputate my head… and my body only deserves this perfect head. I guess Girl B is the person who'll suit me for now.'_

"Girl B," Draco muttered easing, glad he's done with the first round.

Pansy was downright disheartened. Tears slowly forming in her eyes were more than enough to alter her reputation from 'Stupid, Infuriating, Fool' to plain old 'Stupid Fool.'

Hermione's feeling about her loss was quite the opposite from Pansy's. Her grin was far too big for her face. If she could come up with answers like that throughout the game and not waver with using bone crushing –verbal- insults, this game would be in the bag… for her.

Parvati was posing for the camera. She's flashing her 'I Won a Million Bucks' smile while proudly waving at the sleeping crowd.

"For this round, the point goes to Girl B," Dumbledore announced. A large pointy stick, which is supposed to represent the number one, materialized on top of Parvati's head. Parvati goggled at it for a moment before shifting her attention back to the game.

"Next question," Professor McGonagall continued, "'_If you get a change to kiss Draco Malfoy, where would it be_?' Well, you have 30 seconds to come up with answers that have to be PG rated… or lower."

Tink… Tonk… Tunk… Bing! Time's up.

"Girl A, 'First, I would kiss him on the lips, then I would start to go lower until I reach his… (LEGAL RATING EXCEEDED) Keep it clean, will ya?" McGonagall said, looking disgusted, "Let's move on."

"Girl B, 'I would kiss him on the cheeks.' Aww, how cute. Ehem."

Girl C, 'I'd rather kiss the prince who turned into a toad. Well, not really. But they're about equal.' Burn."

McGonagall coughed, "Uh, yes. You can vote now."

For the second time that day, Malfoy thought for a while, _'Girl A is perverted, she oddly reminds me of Parkinson…scary. -Shiver- Her answers leave me disgruntled. _

_How about Girl B? Girl B sounds desperate for me though… sad really. She's gentle and all, but it's just not my type. I'm not into ladies who throw themselves at me… not that it doesn't flatter me, but whatever. Like. _

_Ah, the last person. She sounds like an old lady. My aunt. Wow. I guess she's into the oldies with the courting, meeting the parents, approval and all. Well, teens today are all about going out and self-importance. I guess I'm not good enough for her. Wait a flipping minute. What the heck? Me? Not good enough? I'll show her...'_

"I pick Girl C," Draco said heatedly. He's determined to choose her in the end and prove to her that SHE is not good enough for HIM. Talk about haughtiness on both sides.

For the second time that day, Pansy was unhappy. Right now, she's about as pathetic as she could get. Bundled up in her chair, arms around the knees that were touching her face, she was making herself as small as possible. By now, her reputation was plain old 'Stupid.' Pity. She's the only person who hasn't received a point.

Parvati wasn't threatened. It was an accident. She's prettier than Hermione. Draco didn't mean to choose her instead of herself. After all, B and C were close letters. Rewinding that over and over her head, Parvati tried to hide her pain. She looked at Hermione at happily.

Hermione was mad. No, Hermione was furious. Outraged. INSULTED. How dare he? What the hell has this world come to! Here she was, trying her best to give answers that'll turn off one egotistical man, and he STILL chooses her? Her mission: No holding back. Murderous answers all the way.

"Third question," McGonagall read, "_'What would you do if you won the contest?' _You have 30 seconds starting now."

_- - - - - Switch Scene To Harry And Ron In The Background- - - - -_

"Harry, what if Hermione wins this game?" Ron asked, apprehensively.

"I don't know. I haven't planned that far. I guess Hermione would go crazy. Or Malfoy. Or none of them… they'll exchange spells and blow up the school until someone gives in… or drops dead," Harry replied uncertainly.

"Oh, Harry! Hold me!" Ron exclaimed clinging to Harry's arm. Harry gave RonTHE look and pried his arm out of his grasp while slowly backing away.

_- - - - - Back To The Game - - - - -_

"Thirty seconds are up," McGonagall said, "Girl A; please raise your parchment… Girl A, time's up. Excuse me!"

Pansy looked up and mouthed the words, 'I'm not done.' No way is she losing the third round. She was going to make this answer absolutely perfect. McGonagall zapped the parchment out of Pansy's grasp with a yelp from the girl. She straightened it and started reading.

"Ehem… 'If I win the contest, I'd take him to a tower in the castle and we'll both jump out of it, with brooms of course, and fly for a couple of hours. We'd swoop down into people's dormitoriesand scare them. Our prime target would be the Gryffindors. We'd throw rocks at them until we get tired or a teacher comes to stop us. Then, we'd enter the Slytherin Common room hand in hand and have a nice dinner,'" the answer ended there. For the very first time, Pansy's answer relaxed Draco. Good times.

"Girl B, 'I don't know… I guess whatever he wants, but I'd prefer to shop and gossip with my other friends.'" Even the answer was pretty boring to McGonagall. Shame, shame.

"Girl C, 'I'd spend the afternoon forcing him to watch a hologram of him burning to death. Probably make him a poisoned dinner like Snow White… except I'll lock him up in a coffin and bury him. The beach is also a good. I can bury him in the sand 'till he has to breathe and inhalemicroscopic particlesand he dies. Yeah. That'll be nice.'"

McGonagall glanced at Hermione. She couldn't believe these answers were coming from her student… her TOP student. Ah, what does she expect? They'll die down eventually.

"Vote."

'I never thought I'd ever think this but A's answer sounds pretty fun… making fun of the Gryffindors, having dinner. Ah, I guess she's Slytherin. Finally, the genes in her body kicked in. Girl B lacks imagination. Lots of it. It's a disappointment. Girl C is still ready to mutilate me. Damn, how much does she hate me? Where did I go wrong! Oh well… Wait a second. NOBODY hates me or any other good looking Malfoy that much. It's either the earlier generations of my family were blind for not seeing this, OR she's playing hard to get. I can't believe I hadn't thought of this sooner! I'll pick A for now. Hehe…'

"I pick Girl A."

Finally, Pansy won the lottery. Woohoo! A point finally appeared on top of her head.

First Sentence– It was a quote from one of Stephen King's books… someone said. I tweaked a word though.


	3. Questions Part 2

**Disclaimer: I don't own ****Harry****Potter****.**

**A/N: OH MY GOD!!! I'VE NEVER GOTTEN THIS MUCH REVIEWS IN ALL MY LIFE!! THANKS EVERYBODY!!! And remember; I love you all!! (Tears of joy) I'll try to make this chapter as good as or better than the last chapter, just for everybody. **

"A point for girl A," Dumbledore announced. After a couple of seconds, a number 1 appeared on top of Pansy's head. She started dancing and waving her hands wildly on top of her. Then she started hugging everybody she could get her hands on. McGonagall did a full body bind to calm her down. Then she moved on to the next question.

**"If you end up with ****Draco****Malfoy****, what would you 2 talk about? **Begin writing," the 3 students scribbled madly down on their parchments; especially Pansy. When it was time to read the answers, the 3 showed their answers to the announcer.

"Girl A, '_We will talk about having a baby and what we would name him or her. Then I will bring up the subject of buying loads of cars and I will shop and buy him lots of tuxedos and when he comes home from work, I will say 'Oh Dahling, bhack so sooooon?' then I will kiss him and he will kiss me on my forehead…'_"

** 15 minutes later….**

'…_then our grandchildren will them have babies and I will take care of them. They will buy a car and tuxedos and then th-'Pansy_ didn't finish writing. But everybody was glad she didn't. "Girl A," said McGonagall, "I asked what you would talk about; not your soon to be life story." Pansy just shrugged it off.

"Girl B, _'we would probably talk about his hobbies and my hobbies. Then I would ask him if he's heard of any gossips in Hogwarts lately.'_''

"Girl C, '_I would ask him if he knows any painful ways to murder people. Then I'll ask him if he knows any reapers than can cut off a gel-y head for me. When were done talking about how to murder people, I will personally hand the curvy thing reapers use to cut off heads to the reaper I will soon hire and watch it kill Malfoy. I will then hang his dead body in front of my house every Halloween to scare off Trick-or-Treaters that throw eggs at my door.' _Students, don't get any ideas about the murder attempts given," said McGonagall. But it was too late. Students were already scribbling down their parchments enthusiastically.

Draco voted, '_Let's see, I think I'll pick Girl A…or B….or C… Crap! I can't make up my mind! Well, personally none if their answers seem acceptable to me. I mean who would want to talk about ways to kill you??!!…or gossips… of the rest of their entire pathetic lives??? (Shakes head) girls today… I guess the safest choice would be Girl B. I think my brilliant plan has brilliant flaw… (Sniff) _I'll go with B." he said weakly.

"Point for B!" The one on Parvati's head turned into a 2.

"Woohoo!" she yelled. On her parchment appeared words. They read, 'SHUT UP OR YOU'LL BE DISQUALIFIED!'

"Next question. **If you could say one word to ****Mr.****Malfoy****, what would it be? **Start."

As always, the 3 girls started scribbling down on their parchments, 10 seconds later, they're done. McGonagall read the first answer.

"Girl A, _'I love you! Will you marry me??' _Um…okaaaay, that's 7 things. Girl B, _'Pick me!!!' _Now that's 2 things. Girl C, _'Die!' _Now that's what I'm talking about! She follows instructions unlike some other two girls who are sitting next to her who shall remain nameless." McGonagall looked at the 2. "You can now vote Mr. Malfoy."

_'**Even though C is playing hard to get with all those murderous and insulting answers, I, **_**_Draco_********_Malfoy_****_, shall remain strong no matter how painful those answers are!_**_ Hey, that wasn't a bad speech. I should say it more often. Now let's see, A is too clingy, B is too um… okay, I just don't like her. Girl C is my future winner…even with her answers. I guess I'd better pick her now, just to keep the balance. _"C!"

The things happened so fast. The 2 appeared on top of Hermione's head… Harry and Ron jumped in happiness… Hermione's mouth fell wide open…a fly entered it… she started choking…Madam Pomphrey waved her wand and she was well again… Pansy yelled 'What' but he noise drowned her voice… Draco sneezed…the contest continued.

"Next, **Why do you think you should be handcuffed to ****Draco****Malfoy****? **Ready, begin writing."

The Hall, was quiet. The only sounds you could hear were the scratching of quills the 3 were using to write. Everybody was eager to hear their answers; Draco was too. Finally McGonagall stopped them. "Time to read the responds."

"Girl A, _"I think I should be handcuffed to __Draco__ because I'm a naughty girl. I will (beep) him, (beep) to (beep) so I (beep)…_ Uh… I don't think I'll read the rest of the answer," McGonagall said, "This is not suitable for first years. I'll move on."

"Girl B, _"I think I should be handcuffed to him because I want to tell him all of the gossips going on around the school like about Hufflepuffs thinking Goyle is a girl _(Goyle: I'm not a girl!!! I think…) _and about the blah, blah, blah, blah. _Girl C, _The reason I want to be handcuffed with Malfoy is because if I don't, I'll fail potions. _(Snape: whistles innocently) _But there's also a plus side. He would be miserable while on my company and I can bore him to death and he would probably go bananas because I'll hang out with gossip-y girls that I usually don't hang around with.' _You can vote now."

'_Gee, since when did professor Snape threaten students? Oh yeah, since the Potter gang arrived! I like his style. Now who should I choose? Well of course I can't choose C since I chose her last time. A is way….no… waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay to perverted. B is a little too gossip-y. But those gossips sound interesting. Imagine, Goyle being a girl?? Wait, I remember making a bet 3 years ago about rumors about Goyle. I knew there were some!! I better claim my 50 chocolate frogs from Zabini later. Hold on a sec. OH MY GOD!! I'M STARTING TO LIKE GOSSIPS!! I'M GETTING THE GIRL __RAYS__!! AHHHHHHH!!!!!! Anyway, I'd better vote. _"Girl B."

The 2 on top of Parvati changed into a 3.

**Okay, I'm done with the 3rd chapter. I know it's not as good as the last one but it's the closest I can get. Sorry if I cut the chapters. I have one more chapter about the questionings. So be patient. Be really patient. I won't be updating in 2 months. Well, actually 2 weeks. After that 2 months. I'll to post the next chapter before we leave. Review ok? I'm so happy I got lots of reviews. If I get let's see, if I get about 4 for this chapter, I'll get really discouraged and I'll starting thinking about me losing my touch and be tempted to discontinue this. Believe me, I will. I already discontinued Just Another Week. Review. Tata.**

**IceQueen071**

_Thanks for the questions!! As you can see, I used some of them. If you have questions about the story or questions for the game, tell me._


	4. Questions Part 3

Disclaimer: Harry Potter is not mine.

A/N: The questions I used last chapter were not by me. They were submitted by the reviewers who reviewed my story. Thanks!! The questions in this chapter were not by me too. Well, some of them are by me. I will go fast to with the questions so I can get to the real part. Happy reading!!

"Were down to the last 4 questions of the game," McGonagall said firmly, "So, the scores are, Girl A (Pansy) 1 point, Girl B (Parvati) 3 points, and Girl C, (Hermione) 2 points. I shall proceed to the next question. **If ****Draco****Malfoy**** tries to kiss you, what will you do?**"

The 3 girls, as always, scribbled quickly on their parchments. Inside the girl's heads.

_'Oooohh!! If Drakie tries to kiss me, I will probably melt!!' thought Pansy._

_'__Draco__…what a beautiful name…. I wonder if could change my name into __Draco__ when I grow up….' thought Parvati._

_'If that idiotic idiot comes a foot near me, I'll probably… no! I **will** __Avada__Kedavra__ him so brutal he'll wish he'd never met me,' Hermione thought._

"Time!" said McGonagall while holding the flash cards the questions were in. The 3 stopped and turned their Parchments to McGonagall who read them to Malfoy and the other students.

"Girl A, _'I would kiss him deeper and deeper and put him on the couch and remove his shirt and…'"_McGonagall stopped, "Let's try to keep this G rated please."

Pansy frowned. She wanted to hear the part after that. She puffed her cheeks out and glared at the teacher.

"Girl B, '_I will kiss him back and have a nice snog session under the moonlight' _Parvati thought it wasn't fair that Pansy gets to write nasty answers. _'I want to write those kinds of answers too! She writes what's in her head while I, try to keep mines G rated! Stupid __Parkinson__…'_

Girl C, _I would kill him before he moves and I would kill him a million times more before he hits the ground then I would decapitate him and chop him into a million pieces and feed him to __Professor__Lupin__ on a full moon. _Those are all the answers, you can start voting.

_'Girl A with nasty answers… although I might like them if she was pretty (evil grin) B, with her normal answers and C, god! That was vicious! I guess that means she really wants me!!' _Draco thought happily. "I'm sticking with A." A 2 appeared on top of Pansy's perverted head.

"We're down to the last 3 questions of our game," Mc Gonagall announced, "The 8th question is **If you could clone ****Mr.****Malfoy****, what would you do with the clones?** Start."

You probably know what they're doing… yes; they are writhing on their parchments.

**1 minute later**

"Girl A, '_I'll keep the original and I'll ship one to my sister to marry, and another one for my cousin and another one for my cousin's cousin and I'll keep on cloning him for future (my last name) generations!! It will revolutionize the world! Hahahahahaha!!!'  _Uh, interesting answer… I'll move on.__

Girl B, _'I will sleep with a different clone every night!! Ha! Take that girl A! You think you can come up with nasty answers and hog __Draco__! Not in my game!' _I'll move on… again," said McGonagall adjusting her spectacles.__

Parvati was very satisfied with her answer. That was what exactly was in her mind.

"Girl C, _'I would never clone Malfoy in the first place, one Malfoy's bad enough. But if I did, I'll clone him near a cliff that will give you a painful death if you fall in it. And every time a clone appears, I'll push it down the cliff and watch it die painfully. I will share this blessed privilege to all the people that wants to kill him!' _It's an…uh…interesting thing to share," said the teacher.

"Okay all the answers are shared, Mr. Malfoy you can vote now," said Dumbledore said dully. He was sick of this question and answer business like a certain author.

_'The end is near,' _thought Draco, _'Okay, I shouldn't say that. It's not like I'm going to die any second now. Damn it! This bunny tail is starting to itch! Must… not… scratch… all… attention's… on… me… Maybe I should reconsider and ask Granger to get rid of it for me. BUT!!! I'm not going to beg. I'll simply order her in the name of me. And if she doesn't do it, I'll simply drag her into an empty room and do what boys usually do if they're alone in a room with a girl…BEG. I should be thinking of an answer right now. Not thinking of a way to get rid of this tail. Oh well, a plan is a plan.'_

"Mr. Malfoy," McGonagall said, "You're taking too long to decide which one of these people gets the point. If you don't mind, please hurry."

_'Hey! Malfoy's are not to be rushed!' _Draco yelled mentally, _'Okay, along with my personal opinions. Girl A, wants me too much. I mean, if I probably ask her to marry me she'll say yes way too easily. Malfoys don't take the easy way out. Well, except for getting people in trouble. But that's not the bloody point. Malfoys seek challenge. Moving on… Girl B, Her previous answer was an improvement compared to the ones before that. All the ones before that were too uh… how should I put this… G rated I guess? And Girl C, ah my future winner, still giving murderous answers, aren't we? Oh well.' _"Yo teacher! I pick C!" Draco hollered.

The Hall had suddenly gone dead quiet. A pin drop could be heard clearly. Draco knew what they were thinking of. Why the heck would he pick an answer that would kill him multiple times?

"What?" Draco asked defensively, "Is it illegal to pick murderous answers now? Just mind your own puny little thoughts and I'll mind mine. I have my reasons for my answers."

"Oooohh," was a collective response from the others. The 2 turned into a 3 on top of Hermione's head.

A typical thing happened, Hermione's jaw reached the floor, a fly entered her mouth, Draco sneezed and all that other stuff.

"Filch!! Please get rid of that fly!!" McGonagall ordered, "It's not sanitary. You don't know whose mouths it came from. Plus, it's starting to irritate me!! Next question," McGonagall said while fixing her hair from all the yelling, "**Let's say you're ****Mr.****Malfoy****'s girlfriend, what would you do or how would you react if he dumps you? **You can begin."

After McGonagall read the questions, the 3 had their very own thoughts. Inside their heads…again.

Pansy's thoughts were, 'I haven't thought about that! What if he dumps me!! Oh my god!!!! Ahhhhhhhhh!!!!!!! Nah, he would never do that.'

Hermione's thoughts were, 'He wouldn't dare dump me. I have him under my control. Yes I do. I will hex him to the next century if he does.'

And lastly, Parvati's. 'Nobody dumps me and gets away with it!!'

McGonagall raised her wand and said, "Stop!" The girl contestants stopped writing, besides Pansy of course. She was having another one of her '**long** useful answers.'

"Ms. Par-, uh, Girl A!" the head mistress yelled from the other side of the room. She's been doing a lot of yelling lately, "Drop the quill, step away from the parchment!"

Pansy did so when she saw what McGonagall was holding; a detention parchment, with whom; Filch. Bad combination. It was time to read the answers so McGonagall did.

"Girl A, her answer was '_Uh-uh. Drakie would never dump me. No he won't. But I do know I'm going to be his girlfriend. But if a powerful hypnotist hypnotizes him to dump me, I will simply not believe him and convince him that I'm in love with him and that I will love him forever and ever until he comes back to himself and I'll tell him I love him and he loves me and were a happy family and… I love him very much.'_ At least it's not rated R," McGonagall mumbled, "Next answer,

Girl B, '_Draco__ would never dump me. IF he did, it's probably Girl A's fault. She probably forced __Draco__ to drink a potion and I hate her very much. I'll borrow some 'How to Murder' tips from Girl C and use them on Girl A. I hate that Draco-hogging, nasty-answering, mother- - - - - - - sick little b- - - -!!! I know you're upset about my cursing s - - - but I'm sick of letting them stay in my head! I hate Girl A!!!' _Excuse me but I don't think it's proper to say that. Girl A and B will both receive a month's worth of detention with Filch.

Girl C, _'Oh, I don't think that ferret would have the guts to dump me. I will be the one to dump him! And I would never be his girlfriend for him to dump in the first place. But if I was, just to answer the question, I'll buy this book on 'How to Kill People Namely __Draco__Malfreak__ in __999 Different Painful Ways__'. Then I will try to use them all to kill him. But before all of that, I'll lock him up in a room filled with chalk boards and hire someone to run their nails in them. I'll record a movie with ponies and pink stuff and poofy hearts and happy bouncing bunnies. That'll drive him nuts._' That wasn't too vicious. I guess it's ok."

McGonagall too a deep breath and wiped her forehead using a handkerchief. While doing so, she took a glance at Argus Filch who seemed to be busy writing what looks like a list. It was titled "Ways to Torture Students While in Detention with Me". The number one was 'Lock'em up in a room filled with chalkboards and have someone run their nails on them.' But did she mind? Nooo. She just continued wiping her forehead while waiting for Draco to make his decision.

Draco couldn't help it anymore. He had to scratch, who would focus their attention on his rear end anyway? So he did. Unfortunately, all attentions were on his bunny tail which happens to be on his rear end. Almost everybody saw it, but did they care? Nooo. His coolness was much too strong to be humiliated. I just thought I should type that. Now let's focus on Draco's thoughts.

'_Those were interesting answers. Who invented the 'How to Kill People Namely __Draco__Malfreak__ in __999 Different Painful Ways__' anyway? I need a lawyer!!! I'm banning that book!!! Another thing, it's so nice to hear girls fighting over me. I'm quite used to that. Girl A, nothing different I guess. She's still with all the lovey-dovey stuff. But Girl B!! Gosh. I'm shocked. After all those innocent answers, she suddenly comes up with a detention worth one. OH well, people change. And Girl C! I'm disappointed! Just look at that, advertising a dangerous book. What if she's not playing with all the murderous stuff??? Nah, she is. I think I'll balance this out.' _"I'm choosing Girl A."

All the girls have 3 points. It's anybody's game.

??????????????**COOL HUH??**??????????????

Hi dudes and dudettes! Aren't you glad I updated? Sorry if I'm a little rusty. BUT!! I have an excuse for that. I haven't updated for a long time and the internet dude said to buy an internet card which I don't know how to use. Anyway, review my story because I love reviews; especially long ones. Not that I'm complaining about the short reviews. It's just that I have a lot of time on my hands right now. I still have 1 question left in the story. I'll update as soon as I can. Bye!!!

P.S. since I don't know what to call this: Read JadeHawk's stories. They are really cool and funny especially the part where Goyle turns into an egg. The title is New at Hogwarts. It cracks me up every time I read it!


	5. Kissing Scene

Disclaimer: I don't own anything.

Thanks for all the reviews!! They are all so wonderful! I just hope you like this chapter as much as the last one.

The story last chapter ended after the 9th question. All the girls had 3 points which means the 9 questions were pointless since nothing changed. Almost everybody thought Hermione wouldn't even get a point for all of her murderous answers. But they were wrong. In fact, she was the champion. What about Pansy and Parvati? Let's just say some first years thought they were good wrestlers. Along with the story.

"All the girls have 3 points. Obviously, the girl who gets the point for this round wins the time with Mr. Draco Malfoy," Dumbledore proclaimed, "Minerva, would you please read the next question and end this game. It's quite tiring to sit here for 7 hours. But of course, in the real time, it's only been 7 minutes. Next question please," the headmaster said looking at McGonagall through his half-moon spectacles. McGonagall turned her flash cards and read the last and final question. "**Let's say you got handcuffed with ****Draco****Malfoy**** and we teachers lost the one and only key to them, how would you react?**"

The 3 girls started writing down on their parchments for the last time. It was the question that could win them the game, decide their future; their entire social status can be boosted up or sink down to the mud. Their whole entire lives can depend on this!! Okay, maybe I'm exaggerating too much. But it's still pretty damn important.

After some time, McGonagall raised her hand as a signal to stop. All 3 girls stopped at once. They all turned their parchments and the head mistress read the answers.

Miraculously, Pansy's answer was short. "Answer from Girl A, '_Actually, the teachers wouldn't lose the keys. I will snatch 'em lose them on purpose" _McGonagall was wide eyed after she read Pansy's answer. No rated R's? Not too long? No Malfoy-hogging answers?? Heaven on Earth!! "Moving on…" she said dazedly, "Girl B's answer was, '_That would be the happiest day of my life. I'll start jumping around and hug him'_ and lastly Girl C's, '_I will first go on a murderous rampage with him, then I will insist on cutting his hand off then I shall take him to his parents to see what kind of punishment he'll get for being stuck with a - - - - - - - - - _(Muggleborn [don't tell]) _after that, I'll set my alarm very early and wear ear plugs when it rings, he'll probably have a heart attack and die and I shall be free! Hahahahahaha!!! _Those are all the answers you can now choose which of these ladies you want to be with. Remember, this will go down the school history. Choose wisely."

Draco was smiling for reasons we soon shall find out.

'_This is it!! I shall decide the winner. This will go down the school history!! It's wonderful I'm going to be famous!! Yes!!! Along with my answer,' _"I PICK GIRL C!!"

Hermione's world crumbled. A wild cheer arose from the crowd. Draco was grinning without knowing who he chose. Hermione was still speechless. Draco was still grinning like an idiot. Parvati dragged Pansy into the room of Requirement.

"According to the rules, the man should guess who the girl of his choice was. Then he shall give her a kiss on her cheek." McGonagall read from a thick book.

Hermione's mouth dropped open. Draco grinned even more. He was about to kiss a girl. Snape assisted Draco straight to Hermione. He told Draco to guess who the girl was. Draco reached Hermione. He stuck his hand out and felt her head. Hermione wanted to move away but if she does, she'll flunk potions. Pat…pat…pat… Hmmm… soft hair. "Oooohh!!!! I know who she is!!" Draco chirped. Hermione was relieved. Maybe he wouldn't kiss her. After all, what kind of Malfoy would kiss a 'Mudblood?'

The crown was quiet about his guess. They were ready to hear it. "I know her. She's this Ravenclaw girl isn't she??" Draco asked. Everyone fell down with their feet sticking up.

"Are you sure about that Mr. Malfoy?" Professor McGonagall asked.

"The surest I could get!" Draco replied proudly, sticking his nose up in the air.

"Okay then, we will unblindfold you and you have to kiss the lady of your choice whether you're right about your guess or not." The head mistress said untying the knot of the blindfold. The blindfold fell out of Draco's eyes. He saw who he chose…

****

**Setting: Room of Requirement**

Parvati dragged Pansy to the Room of Requirement. A wrestling ring appeared. Just what they needed. Along with the ring came a referee and a bunch of people watching; some even first years. Perfect.

Parvati conjured up a microphone and spoke, "Pansy! How dare you hog Draco! I could've won the contest if it weren't for you, you Draco hogging freak!"

Pansy conjured a microphone of her own and spoke, "You callin' me a freak?? Have you looked in a mirror? I saw Draco first and I'm keepin' him! You can't do a damn thing to stop me!"

"I'll wrestle you for him," Parvati lunged at Pansy and sat on her. She kept on punching her face over and over.

****

**Announcer: **Pansy was trying to kick Parvati out of her. She started kicking her back and finally caused enough damage to make Parvati stop the fiery punches... Pansy took the opportunity and climbed the 3rd rope of the ring, ready to dive at Parvati. But Parvati recovered quickly and pushed Pansy out of the rope. She placed her head between her legs and did a beautiful Pile Driver. Pansy was knocked out. Parvati climbed the top rope and did a 5 Star Frog Splash! What a perfect finishing move! She got on top of Pansy and the referee did the countdown.

"One! Two! Three!!!" the wrestling bell sounded. The match was over!! Parvati got up and took her microphone, and started rambling some curses at Pansy. The referee gave Parvati a big fat wrestling belt and raised her hand in victory.

****

**Great Hall**

"You!!!" Draco said in horror pointing a finger at Hermione. Now he knew the murderous answers were for real. 'Oh boy, I'm dead,' he thought. Just then, she remembered; he had to kiss her. 'Crap! Her Mudblood germs will get on me!!'

"Mr. Malfoy, It's impolite to point at people," said Snape. Draco lowered his finger.

"Ehem," McGonagall breathed, "Both of you will have to put on the cuffs."

'Oh the horror!!!' Hermione thought, 'He probably spends his time running around the school garden like a maniac chasing after pretty little birds and then plucking their pretty little feathers!' She gave Draco a glare that can freeze hell. Draco returned the favor and gave her a glare that can make hell burn again.

McGonagall approached the miserable teens carrying a spell-proof handcuff. The 2, typically, ran opposite directions thinking:

'No ferret's going to kiss me!'

'I'm not kissing anybody!'

Unfortunately, Snape and Filch were too fast for them. The headmistress locked the cuffs and ordered Draco to kiss Hermione's cheek.

"Mr. Malfoy, I order you to kiss Ms. Granger's cheek," she ordered.

"And if you don't, I'll make sure I see both of you next year with the 5th years," Snape added.

Draco immediately leaned down. Slowly, his soft lips came in contact with Hermione' rosy check.

'I can't believe it! I'm actually kissing her!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Hey, this isn't so bad. Maybe I should move to her mouth.' So he did.

'Eeeeyuck!!! Malfoy's kissing me! But I have to admit, this isn't as bad as I expected it would be. Oh my God!! What are his lips doing on top of mine!!?? Shit! I'm contaminated! But gosh, he's a good one.'

The crowd cheered. This was a view of a life time and Colin Creevey took a picture of it. The 2 kissed passionately not bothered by who's watching. The kiss unexpectedly broke after they heard a sudden ear piercing bang from outside. The students accompanied by the teachers rushed out to see what the racket was all about. The teachers saw a horrifying sight, but the students saw a wonderful one. Guess what? Or should I say Guess WHO?

A/N: Yeah, Yeah, I know, not the best chapter. Oh well.


	6. A Simple Plan

Disclaimer: Nope, not mine.

Thanks to **citcat299**, I was able to see my mistakes. I guess you were the only one who noticed it. Indeed, I made McGonagall too soft with no reasons. And I also made Harry and Ron agree to the plan almost too quickly. So here's and edited chapter. I sort of changed the part where McGonagall talked to the twins about staying and the part where Harry and Ron agreed to the plan.

Almost everyone at Hogwarts ran outside to see what the racket was all about. Everybody was shocked to see who decided to pop in! Fred and George Weasley!! The teachers groaned, Slytherins moaned and all the other students cheered. Harry, Ron, Hermione and (forced) Draco ran to greet them.

"Fred! George! What are you guys doing here? You couldn't have apparated. You can't." Hermione questioned.

"That's a polite way to greet them," Harry said sarcastically, "But… how **did** you get here?"

"That's quite simple," said Fred.

"We were trying to make…" George began.

"A potion that will turn your hair soft for a week then it will come to life and probably beat the crap out of you, but we…"

"Didn't have the right ingredients so we replaced half of them…"

"While Fred was stirring it he was saying 'We can sell this at Hogwarts'…"

"The next thing we knew, we were here."

"Oooohh." The three of them chorused.

Silence... The twins surveyed Hermione because they sensed something was different. George's gaze landed on Hermione's hand. He elbowed Fred and Fred read George's mind.

"Hermione, why are you chained to him?" Fred asked giving Draco a very nasty glance. George nodded along while Fred was asking the question.

Harry sighed, "Come on, lets go to the Griffindor Common room. We'll explain everything there." He took Hermione's un-cuffed hand and led the way.

"OH NO!!!" Draco snapped, "I'm not going to a Griffindor Common room! It's probably full of Mudbloods and I DON'T associate with Mudbloods!" He stopped and pulled his hand attached to the handcuff pulling Hermione along with him.

After 6 years of being called Mudblood, Hermione was used to the term and thought of it as a normal word. She merely shrugged it off, stared at Draco and spoke.

Ron nudged Harry, "Bloody hell, I think Herm is about to crack! Come on, help my get rid of all the sharp objects." The two quickly dashed to the nearest sharp objects close to Hermione which were Colin Creevy's pointy camera, a twig that Dean Thomas was fiddling with, and Fred's suitcase with pointy corners.

"Who said we're taking you with us?" Hermione asked almost too innocently, "Why, I shall personally cut your hand off and leave you behind… RON HAND ME A BLOODY CHAINSAW!!!" she exploded giving Draco the most vicious look she could muster. When no chainsaw was handed, she ran after Draco.

Since they were handcuffed together, Draco didn't get a very good lead. In fact, 2 meters was the farthest distance he could get from the 'evil Hermione.' He was practically dragging her with him since he was running faster. Hermione has both of her hands outstretched ready to strangle Draco if he could just slow down a bit. Draco usually loves to see Hermione pissed, but in a situation where a half-crazed woman is chasing you ready to kill, he didn't find this amusing.

"You idiotic ferret! Why the hell did you choose me! I tried my best to give you all the murderous answers I could come up with… but Nooo, you had to choose me!!" Hermione bellowed on top of her lungs, enabling the entire school to hear.

Draco didn't think of that… "I thought you were playing hard to get!" he yelled back lamely. The whole student body cracked up! Ron was leaning on Harry for support, George had tears in his eyes, Harry was clutching his stomach in pain from laughing, and even the Slytherins were cracking up… well all of them except Crabbe and Goyle, who unfortunately were too stupid to get what was funny. Goyle, who was a bit smarter than Crabbe, miraculously caught the joke and explained it to Crabbe. The two dimwits started to guffaw.

"Alright! Nothing much to see here! Go back inside!" McGonagall instructed. "Twins,"

"Yeah?" Fred and George asked tearing their eyes form the scene.

"Visitors aren't usually allowed inside the school," But the teacher looked back through the memories with the twins. Making Umbridge miserable, helping the witch quit her job, McGonagall smiled a bit, "But since both of you helped to make Umbridge's stay here miserable, I'll make an exception. You have 2 hours. You can stay at the Griffindor tower for now. Don't cause trouble." She reminded them. The headmistress gathered the students inside and sent them to their House Common Rooms.

"Thanks!" yelled the two.

The only students left were Fred, George, Harry, Ron, Draco (still running) and Hermione (still crazy).

McGonagall talked to them, "Twins, if you are going to stay at Hogwarts, I expect both of you to behave. Mr. Weasley and Potter, please, help Ms. Ganger adjust to the situation. Both of you are the closest people to her." The teacher lowered her voice to a whisper, "And also, I know both of you are not very close to Mr. Malfoy but please, control him. I doubt Mr. Crabbe and Mr. Goyle can handle the problem. Why, those two numb sku-… I mean, students, wouldn't recognize a problem even if it did the salsa in front of them."

Harry was going to argue but McGonagall interrupted him, "Don't worry, I'll handle this after I handle the class." Harry looked relieved after hearing this.

"Um… professor, how are we supposed to bring those two into our Common Room?" the young Weasley asked.

"Make them fall asleep or something," with that, she stalked off the scene.

"Okay," Ron said confusedly, "Whatever she says." He bended down and picked up two enormous rocks. Before Harry could stop him, Ron chucked the first and second rock straight at Draco and Hermione's heads knocking them out cold. Ron has a pretty good aim.

"Uh…Ron," Harry said holding up an index finger, "I was thinking more of a less painful way, like a sleeping spell," Harry said staring at the two unconscious bodies in front of them.

"Oh, yeah… huh?" Ron said grinning in shame.

"Okay, they're asleep makes no difference." George interrupted.

"I guess," the other three replied. Harry and Ron levitated Hermione and Draco to their tower. They didn't stay in the common room since the other students were giving Draco nasty looks. So the 6 headed to the Boys' Dormitory. They landed Draco and Hermione on Neville's bed. It was a little cramped because it's a single person bed. But they didn't have much choice. And so, Ron and Harry told the twins the story.

"It all started out like this," Ron began, "I was happily eating breakfast. Then, Hermione suddenly busted in the Great Hall with a green face ready to curse Malfoy…"

15 minutes later.

This time, Harry was finishing the story, "… then Malfoy kissed Hermione on the lips for quite some time. My poor friend, she wasn't able to push him off. He probably chocked her to death! Then an ear splitting noise was heard and we all went outside and saw you two." Harry finished. He was really out of breath.

"That explains the poofy tail Malfoy has," George said. "So, they have to stay like this for the rest of the day… Hmm… Fred, are you thinking of what I'm thinking?"

"No, unless what you're thinking of is snatching the key from McGonagall and making it appear the teachers lost the keys and making Hermione and Draco stuck like this for a couple of weeks so they can get to know each other, sleep together, learn to get along, annoy each other to death and be friends or more." Fred replied.

George was teary-eyed after he heard Fred's ranting. "You read my mind!"

"Uh… guys, I don't Hermione will like that plan," Harry said uncertainly, "I mean, she hates Malfoy more than hell itself. Plus, she'll probably kill both of us," Harry said glancing at Ron.

"Yeah, just look at those 2," Ron said jerking his head on Hermione and Draco's direction, "Their faces are all scrunched up. I bet they feel each others presence." Indeed, the faces of the two enemies are all screwed. But it wasn't from being next to each other. It's because of the pain the bumps on their heads are causing. I mean, the rocks WERE pretty big.

But George wasn't about to give up, "Come on people, look at it this way, you can both be free. I mean… Hermione is always breathing down your necks. Always ready to order you to do your homework. But when she's busy trying to cut off Malfoy's hand, she wouldn't even know you're there. You can dance around the Great Hall naked, you can break all the rules you want, you can even copy off of her homework due in 3 months. She won't notice with Malfoy around."

These were enough reasons for Harry and Ron.

"Okay, we're in, we only need the key." George dug inside this pocket and held out a key. "How did you?" "I have talent."

Thanks again to **citcat299** for the constructive flame. If you have any writing suggestions, post it in your reviews. I need some serious advice.

IceQ.


	7. Another Simple, Yet Evil, Plan

Disclaimer: Not mine… you should already know that.

Thanks for the reviews. Keep on reviewing if you don't want my ego to starve.

It's been an hour and 15 minutes since Fred and George came. During those precious minutes, they have been taking orders of Prank stuff.

During a 5 minute break, Harry took the opportunity to ask George something.

"Hey, um… since it was an accident you got here, how did Fred manage to grab the suitcase? I mean, it's not like he carries that suitcase of stuff everywhere."

"Actually, he carries it everywhere… even in the bathroom," he said disgusted, "I believe it's water proof. It contains every order we get."

"Oh… ok."

"Harry, I want you to have this," George said giving Harry a sample of the potion they were brewing before Hogwarts, "It might come in handy."

"Um… thanks," he said not knowing what to do with it. He figured he should probably give it to Hermione."

Meanwhile…

Ron was in his dormitory fidgeting with the twig he took from Dean Thomas before. He was starting to worry because Hermione and Draco weren't waking up… well, Hermione anyway. He doesn't give a damn about Draco. 'Oh man, I shouldn't have thrown that rock at her… what if she has amnesia? What if she doesn't wake up? What if she's having one of those eternal bleeding thing??' So many 'what if's' so little time… He grabbed one of those Every Flavored Beans and shoved one in his pie-hole. 'Eeeewww, slug flavor…' he thought wincing. He remembered in second year, when he had a wand problem… so many slugs…

"HI RON!!" Harry shouted entering the room. Ron nearly jumped out of his skin. "Harry!! Don't do that! You scared the daylights out of me!" he said putting a hand in his chest. He felt his heart pumping rapidly. "Harry! I swear!!" he said shaking his head.

"Why are you so jumpy?" Harry asked frowning.

"Hermione isn't awake yet. I think I killed her…" he said uncertainly.

"Nah, it'll take more than that to kill Hermione," Harry said calmly, "Come on, it's 5 minutes to lunch. They'll probably wake up tomorrow..." with that, the two strode off the room.

Great Hall, Griffindor lunch table

"Pass the salt, Harry," Ron said. As always, his plate was overflowing with food; fried chicken, blueberry muffins, more chicken, extra juicy streak, some vegetables, spaghetti, more chicken, and more muffins. No one had an idea why he needs the salt for. And as always, Harry didn't question Ron's crazy recipes.

"Here," he passed while swallowing some of the food in his mouth. It's amazing how he can still talk with clumps of food in there.

"Fanks," he muttered while eating the food. Ron poked Harry to get his attention. He then held up a hand meaning 'hold on, I have something to ask you'. When he finally swallowed the food, the asked "Are you sure Hermione won't find out about our plan? She always finds out, one way or the other," he said frowning at the horrible taste in his mouth.

"I don't know. But with the thing we're going to gain, it's worth it. Think about it…" he said imagining how miserable Draco's going to be. Hermione throwing darts at Malfoy's eyes while sleeping… he sighed dreamily, Ron raising an eyebrow.

"Okay… whatever you say," he said scooting away from Harry. Seriously, the look on his face was freaking Ron out.

"Fred! George!" Ron called. The twins were busy telling lame jokes but apparently cracking one side of the table up.

The two looked up and said to the others, "Wait a sec everyone... be right back." The two walk over to Ron and said "You rang?"

"Um… want to visit Hermione. And maybe bring them food. 'W_hat am I saying?'_ I meant bring HER food. She might be hungry when she wakes up." he said thoughtfully.

"Ooooooooooo…" Fred teased, "Looks like our little Ronnikins has a little crush," the two cracked up.

"So what??" Ron said annoyed, "I'm sixteen for Pete's sake! Bring the food, guys. Come on!" He dragged Harry with him who happens to be flirting.

"Ron!!" Harry protested, "I was about score a date!!" He didn't care. The twin's brought some food.

Griffindor tower, boys' dormitory.

The four entered the dormitory where Hermione and Draco were sleeping. Harry was moping because of the loss of a date. Ron was fuming because of the 'little crush'. The twins were sniggering because they have an evil plan.

"Where's the food?" Ron demanded at the twins. George and Fred handed him 4 jars of honey. Ron didn't take them.

"That's the food you brought??" he said shrilly. "Why…why… that's bee food!"

"Fine." Fred said. He and George opened the four jars and poured two parts on Draco and Hermione's lower part of the body, and the other half on their heads; careful to not get any on the bed sheets and on their eyes.

"What are you guys doing?!?" Ron shrieked.

"Obviously, they are pouring honey on Malfoy and Hermione, Ron," Harry said in an irritated manner. He was still not over the date thing.

"Why?" he asked, not noticing the tone of Harry voice.

George answered this time, "We want them to take a bath."

"But they can't take a bath with those cuffs on them!" Ron protested blushing at the thought, "They have those _things_," he pointed at the cuffs.

The twins smiled, "That's the beauty of it,"

Hah! The twins have another evil plan! Aren't you guys glad I updated early?? Review this and all the other chapters if you don't mind. Byezz!!


	8. Ginny Knows the Plan and Bathing

Hello. I know I haven't been doing a good job updating. I'm sorry. I decided to re-do the last two chapters since they're not really good.

By the way, I'm not sure about the romance part of this story. I'm really good with that so I'll change the genre to pure Humor. When I figure out my Romance writing problem, I might change the Genre.

Chapter 8 and 9 edit.:

**Setting: Great Hall**

It's a new day at Hogwarts as well as with the rest of the world… in some places anyway. Hermione and Draco are still out cold due to the impact of the big rocks chucked on their heads. They WERE big. But it's a good thing that they're still unconscious because if they're awake, WW3 will take place. Overnight, the honey on their bodies dripped all over Neville's bed. They are in a sweet sticky situation. By the way, since Neville's bed is occupied, he had to sleep in the Hospital Wing. Why not Hermione or Draco's beds? Simple. The girls were ready to evacuate when Neville entered the Girls' Dormitory. The Slytherins took their wands out the moment Neville entered the Slytherin Common Room. They were ready the pulverize him. Pulverizing students is strictly prohibited at Hogwarts.

Meanwhile, in the Great Hall, Gryffindor Table, Harry and Ron were busy eating breakfast and talking to Ginny, not the least bit guilty about letting Fred and George take advantage of Hermione's situation. Psh. Moments before, they handed Draco and Hermione's wands to Dumbledore in fear of the two killing each other.

"You guys should be ashamed of yourselves!" Ginny exclaimed at the two pigs. Her red hair was getting puffier by the minute. Harry was telling Ginny their plans for Draco and Hermione. He considered Ginny would be in 100 since her brothers were so eager about it. Harry decided not to tell the young Weasley about the honey part of the plan. He concluded that she'll overload and explode.

"It's not that bad. We're promoting House Unity," Ron reasoned. He has a point there. That made Ginny consider their diabolical plan.

"Well, there are other things you can do to encourage people. Why do you have to use Hermione? She's one of your best friends. Think about how she'll feel," Ginny pointed out.

It was Harry's turn to talk, "Well, uh…" Harry stuffed Pumpkin Pastries in his mouth trying to stall. Ginny is a pretty smart girl and a good debater. He has no answer to her line at the moment. He chewed the Pastries as slowly as he can. That ought to buy him time. The started to think, _'Well, I want to use Hermione since nothing exciting has happened to the group lately, I want to copy some of her homework… and yeah, yeah, the House Unity thingy… what else? I need something good!! Oh I got it!!'_

Harry finally swallowed his Pastry which was turned to mush in his mouth. He looked Ginny at the eye. "Ginny please don't tell Hermione!" He begged, rising from the bench and getting on his knees.

Ginny was embarrassed at his sudden outburst. Ron was too ashamed of his friend to even look at the scene. Harry didn't seem to mind his begging.

"Well," Ginny said not knowing what to say. She has a small liking for Harry and Hermione is her friend. This is a friend or boy situation, "Um, I don't know Harry. I don't want to get involved in this… but… well… Okay, I'll pretend I don't know about your plan. I'm not going to tell Hermione about it, and I'm not going to be in it. Got it?"

Harry nodded getting to his feet.

**Setting: Harry, Ron, Neville, and some other dude's Dormitory.**

In the Dormitory Hermione and Draco is snoozing in, things are about to happen. Hermione started to stir. But she can't really move much since there was honey everywhere, but eventually, she woke up. The first thing she realized was that she was in a different room. That wasn't her ceiling… and the bed is soggy. '_How odd.'_ A train of yesterday's memories entered her mind. She then remembered everything...okay, just some of it. Not the Ron chucking the rock part. She struggled to stand up and realized she was coated with honey. 'Great.' She thought miserably.

She glanced at the person next to her… just as she guessed, it was Draco. She groped for her wand but she couldn't find it. She thought Draco hid it so she decided to wake him up.

She sleepily poked his head with her honey coated index finger. He too, started to stir. He let out a small groan.

"My back hurts," he mumbled, not bothering to open his eyes, "Same with my head."

"What do you expect?" she said sharply. She was trying to sound mean and angry, but mornings aren't just her thing. Hearing her voice, Draco's eyes snapped open and he jolted up. His hair was partly glued to his head, with a spiky splat, and a splash of Mohawk-ness in style. It was pretty ugly. (Ron and Harry couldn't resist)

"HOLY SH-"

"Don't say it!" Hermione interrupted. She tried not to swear much these days. She made the decision after dropping her books, and by habit, she yelled a stream of curses in front of a teacher. "We need a bath."

It was only then when Draco realized what was covering him.

"Euck! For once, I agree with you," Draco said. He groped for his wand in the bed but it was nowhere to be found. "Okay, jokes over, where's my wand?"

"What do you mean? Why would I want your wand? Where's MY wand?" She demanded angrily, holding out a hand.

Draco scooped some honey from his body and wiped it on Hermione's outstretched hand. This got Hermione mad so with the same hand, she rubbed it on Draco's face.

"What the-" He bonked Hermione's head on the bed sheet with was also covered with honey. Then, he started the smother her with the honey.

Hermione kicked his shin and took control. It was her turn to smother him with honey.

"Mmmphh!! Shtop!" he yelped. Hermione stopped at once_. What have I done? I actually sank this low. I'm like an uncivilized witch! A barbarian!!_

"Sorry," she muttered. Draco grunted. Hermione thought it was a yes.

"We need a bath," he stated, "We have to do it the normal way since we don't have our wands with us."

"Gee, you think?" Hermione scoffed, "I want to take it in the Girls' Dorm."

"No way! I can't be sure of my privacy there! Girls are stalking me! Hmm… And I bet they'll be taking pictures of me bathing."

Draco half whined and half smirked at what the said. _Oh yeah, I'm loved._

"Oh no… Oh no, no, no, no, no, no, no…, I am NOT taking it in the Slytherin Dorm. Never! I'd rather dine with Filch!" Hermione argued. She set her hands in front of her meaning it was her final decision.

"Okay, one way to settle this. I'm thinking a number 1-10, what is it?" Draco said.

"No! You have the advantage there!"

"What do you propose? Hurry up. This is very uncomfortable. I'm on a bed, with sticky slimy honey all over my body, don't forget, I'm talking to a Mudblood, which I'm not supposed to do, And there's this other part where my bum hurts because of a puffy bunny tail someone who shall remain nameless conjured." He grumbled firmly.

Hermione cracked a smile on the bunny comment. "Fine, let's go to the Slytherin Dorms. I think it's a long way from here and we'll run into awful lot of students along the way. They'll _see us looking like crud_, but I don't mind since my rep is already trashed. I don't know about you but, sure. We'll go there."

_Sometimes, I wonder if I'm just too smart._ Hermione thought slyly.

"Okay! Fine! I'll bathe here. But I'll hold you responsible for my rabid fan girls."

"Deal," They both held out honey covered hand to shake. But instead, they rammed it on each other's faces trying to smother one another. Natural.

**Setting: Gryffindor Bathroom**

Hermione gathered the soap, shampoo, wash cloth and all those other things you need to take a bath. Draco, with no choice, got stuck helping her. But while helping, his puny little brain is thinking of something. _How will I bathe with this Mudblood chained to me…? Oh I know! Wait, I think it's prohibited to cut someone's hand off. What about making her dive in the bath tub? Nah, she'll see something she shouldn't. I doubt she'll do it anyway. Man, I missed my breakfast. I bet everything Crabbe and Goyle are feasting on the sweets Mom sent me. Darn them and their food eating abilities. Anyway, bathing brings a new question. What am I going to wear? What if-_

"Malfoy!" his thoughts were interrupted by Hermione, "Wake up and help me!"

Draco obediently helped her lift the basket that contained everything they needed to have a successful bath. They dumped them all in the enormous bathtub filled with water. Hermione carefully took the scissors from the sink and started to cut Draco's robe.

"Hey! What do you think you're doing! These are new robes!" Draco screamed, grabbing the scissors out of Hermione's hand.

"I need those!" Hermione made an attempt to grab the scissors back from him. Draco raised the scissors high above his head. Hermione was too short to reach it so she crossed her arms in front of her chest. "I need to cut your robes so you can take them off," she explained, "See? I already cut mines apart." She showed her clothes which we're torn in the part where her hand with the handcuff began.

"Fine," Draco agreed, "But how do you know I want to take mines off?" He asked her with a raised eyebrow, a smirk forming on his mouth.

"Ugh, fine, bathe with that sticky thing on." She undressed herself and luckily, she was wearing a shirt underneath her robes. She didn't cut that part off. She jumped into the bathtub and made a huge splash, wetting part of Draco's right arm. Draco cut off his robs in the end and jumped in, in his boxers. He tried to drown Hermione with the huge splash he made. He failed though.

Hermione started scrubbing herself with the face towel while Draco was desperately trying to give his hair back its usual hotness. Speaking of hotness, Hermione was trying very hard to ignore the fact that Draco Malfoy was bathing with her. Most girls would murder for the chance. After a couple of minutes, they did the opposite. The bath was unusually quiet. One reason was because Draco wasn't making any snappy comments. In fact, he was actually, stirring some up in this head. He was planning of revenge because Hermione cut off his robe and the bunny tail thing...

A smirk started to form on his lips while scrubbing his body and tail. _We'll see the reaction… _He thought evilly. He quickly finished bathing and stepped out of the tub. He told Hermione to take her time bathing. Hermione did so. She dunked her head in the tub to wash off the soap in her hair. After about a10 minutes, Draco was still standing. He finally spilled his secret.

"Granger, I peed in there before I left." He said laughing.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!" Hermione jumped out of the tub and delivered a punch to Draco's gut. She started yelling a stream of curses but they will not be mentioned due to the story rating.

Okay, I think this chapter was better than the last two. I'll type the next chapter next time. My fingers are cramping. Bye!

Maligayang Pasko!! (Merry Christmas!)

**Ş ı Ŀ џ Έ я- Ş ŏ x**


	9. It's Going To Be A Long Year

**Disclaimer: Harry Potter isn't mine.**

The two came out of the bathroom after an extensive amount time since Hermione had to re-take the bath due to the Urine Incident. Dumbledore sent Dobby, the free house elf, in the dorm and provided the two with fresh robes that had zippers on the sides so they could wear them AND re-zip. Hermione walked outside followed by Draco, who really didn't have a choice, into the Great Hall. The moment they set foot in it, the room erupted with a hearty applause from everyone. Why, they were the hottest news at Hogwarts.

**Pureblood Muggleborn-Hater and Muggleborn Who Hates That Pureblood: Can They Survive Together?**

Hermione blushed at the sudden gain of attention and turned her gazed down. Draco seemed to be enjoying it: he was waving his unchained hand gracefully like he won a Beauty Pageant with a million dollar smile on his face. The duo marched proudly and shyly towards the teacher's tables and demanded freedom. Anyone can read the happiness and sunshine light on Draco and Hermione's faces since they're about to go on their separate destinies and have their own lives back. They're going to dine and bathe without killing someone… they're free to roam around the school. All their friends, or bodyguard friends, can go do the normal things they usually do… If only.

"WHAT?" The two exclaimed. Hermione was ready to have a seizure and convulse on the marble floor. Draco looked as if someone drained his bank account and now he has to live with muggles and work. The room started spinning in the couples' visions.

"I'm sorry, but there's nothing that can be done about this. The key was misplaced and I'm afraid there's no other way to open the lock," Dumbledore explained apologetically. Dumbledore's eyes glimmered, "Here, both of you can have your private dormitory and common room. Your classes will be rescheduled so you have each class together. How's that?"

Hermione was the first to regain her composure, "I-I don't know…" She said, her voice filled with uncertainty, "Can we have the day off to… you know… research in the library for any information about breaking enchanted handcuffs?"

"Be my guest."

"Wait… does this mean I have to mingle with Granger's friends?" Draco inquired, "Because if it does, father would totally be against it and he would surely fry the school and everyone will die," Draco pathetically threatened… "Oh, can you please get this tail off me?" He muttered. With a whoosh of his wand, Dumbledore made the irritating tail vanish.

"Professor," Hermione whispered to Dumbledore so Malfoy, who began to wave at students again, couldn't hear, "Can we have out wands back. Well, you don't have to give Malfoy's wand but can you at least give me mine?" Hermione babbled. The headmaster fumbled in his robe pocket and found the two magic sticks.

"Here," He handed Hermione both wands, "Be careful, Ms. Granger. You're one of the most trusted students in Hogwarts… and the smartest too. I'm expecting a lot from you. No more rabbit tails or any tail for that matter." He gave Hermione a stern look from his half-moon spectacles. Hermione nodded in agreement. The two left with heavy hearts to eat their first breakfast together.

When it came to going to their tables, they went the opposite directions and ricocheted back to each other.

"Slytherin table!"

"Gryffindor table!"

"Hufflepuff table," said a voice from behind them. The both turned from each other and gazed at the face of Minerva McGonagall. _'Oh boy,_' they both thought. Hufflepuff was the sappiest table in the whole school according to some stereotypes. People spent their days crying over broken plates and writing poetry about love and bunnies with cotton ball tails. Everyone thinks that in the Hufflepuff common room, they spend their spare time holding hands and dancing in circles while wearing a crown of beautiful daisies on head pitiful heads. This is not the type of people both of them want to eat breakfast with.

"Excuse me?" Draco asked flabbergasted.

"You heard me," the professor said, "Hufflepuff. You're going to spend most of your time with them so no one gets more attention than the other." The two marched with heavier hearts to the feared table and sat at the very end… far, far from people. Unfortunately, a group of Hufflepuff 6th years sat right next to them since that's where they usually ate. Dining was silent except for the clatter of forks and spoons and Hermione and Draco's usual bickering.

"Ow! Stop pulling my hand!"

"I'm trying to get the chicken! Blame the blasted cuffs!"

"I blame you!"

"Why you little…" –coughing noises-

Hermione decided to quit dining. Draco did too. It just wasn't worth it.

"So!" Hermione began, trying to start a conversation with the Hufflepuffinians, "For how long do you dance around in your common room while holding hands? Do you go on until you get dizzy or something?" One Hufflepuff looked up and raised his eyebrow and then he looked back down and continued ripping the flesh off the chicken with his mouth. Draco sniggered at lack of attention Hermione's getting.

"Watch a master socialize," he said.

"Ehem… do you dance and sleep with rabbits often?" Draco inquired to the same guy. He got no response. "Excuse me! I asked you a question!" The guy stood up and grabbed Draco by the collar.

"Shut the up. Do you think I'm the type to dance around and frolic shamelessly?" The guy had broad shoulders and a bulgy body He had small eyes and will remind one of a bully. He cracked his neck and knuckles.

Draco was too shocked to fight back. Who know Hufflepuffinians could be so vicious! "No?" he managed to squeak.

"Then shut it."

Draco and Hermione thought the same thought and stood from the table and rushed to the library. This was going to be a long year if the handcuffs weren't off.

* * *

**Guess who's back? Bahahaha! Oh, I retyped chapter one. I think it's better than the last one. I'm planning to retype all of the chapters in this story. It will take a lot of time and will power but I'll do my best.**

**To BabyRuth: **Don't hate me! –Cries- I'm continuing!

**To Tatapp: **Don't be a hater. I'm typing here.

**To xOxOkIsSmYaSsXoXo: **I'd rather not. I hope you're happy I'm continuing this. You scared me.

**To Tink: **Bahaha, guess who's back.

**To krystagurl04046:** I'm writing another chapter or more.

**To Pissed Off:** Guess again. I'm continuing. Next time, try not to curse.

**To Fionger: **YOU!You did something that gave me a massive writer's boost. I'm sure you don't know what, well; it's a secret that I'll know. Lol. Thank you.

**To Nilfheim: **Heh, really? Thanks. I cringe when I read the previous chapters. I'm glad you don't.

**To SmartAznGirl13: **Here I am. Continuing.

**To Snape-ette: **oo Okay? –Bows head in shame- I'm continuing. Don't have a seizure. I appreciate your liking for my story, but switch to violence? –Gasp! - Heh.

**To Alavna: **"You must continue." Presto! I'm back!

**To SaturnNeko: **I'm glad you appreciate my writing. . ; Don't glare. You scared me.

**To LaxGoalie:** Bahaha, your reading wasn't in vain. I'm updating!

**To PeanutButterOreoCookieGirl: **Heh, you can finish this if you want to… I'm also finishing it. Maybe you can tweak the plot or something?

**To Debatingqueen:** I'm not discontinuing this.

**To SlytherinRoyalty: **-Hides behind a couch- Wait; you hid your weapon… Nevermind. –Comes back out- I'm glad you respected my decision. Bahaha!

**To CitCat299: **Thank you!

**To NorteDameGirlie:** Thank you soooo much for telling me! I need reviewers like you to guide me around the complicated process of writing.

I guess that's everyone who thought I was discontinuing this. The first reviewers didn't see my message so… yeah. They thought I was continuing. Thanks for the encouragements! And for the people who wanted to continue my story, you can still continue them. I'm glad you actually liked them!


	10. Detention

**Harry Potter isn't mine. **

**Author:** I'm still alive. I know, I know, I've been a lousy author to everybody. I'm sorry. But I'm not abandoning the story. I shall finish it no matter what. Hopefully.

- - - -

Draco twitched.

He twitched again…

And again…

And again…

"Will you stop twitching!" Hermione said sharply looking up from behind a monstrous book. Odd as it seems, she was getting sick and tired of reading. She spent the past seven hours researching about cursed handcuffs, _charmed_ handcuffs, Hogwarts tradition, missing keys and extreme knock-out curses. The knock-out curses were her last resort. If nothing and absolutely NOTHING can get the handcuffs off, she'd simply stun Draco for days at a time and get on with her life levitating an almost lifeless body while enduring teases and taunts from her peers and dodging Draco's parents' killing curses. The thought made her nauseous.

"I can't help it."

"Do something productive then. Like, I don't know… reading a book?" She was trying to be patient. She really was.

"I _told_ you, I'm on my break. I can't read for hours at a time. It gives me stress wrinkles."

"YOU'VE BEEN ON YOUR BLOODY BREAK FOR TWO HOURS! YOU'D BETTER START HELPING ME BEFORE I SHOVE MY BLOODY WAND UP YOUR ARSE!"

Madam Pince threw them out of the library and gave them a 2 hour ban.

"A TWO HOUR BAN! How could this happen to me on the day I needed the library most! This is ridiculous!" There's one word to describe Hermione right now: hysterical. Well, there's also angry, confused, and irritated. "This is all your fault, Malfoy, of you weren't so lazy back there; I wouldn't have lost my temper! I don't know what to do now! STOP MOVING SO MUCH!" With that, Hermione slumped on the floor and finally broke down. She's had enough of everything; Missing keys, reading, Malfoy, everything going wrong, not eating breakfast or lunch and responsibilities.

Malfoy got dragged down against his will but that didn't matter this time. He somewhat felt sorry for her. Well, almost. He was hungry too. And he was also tired of reading, missing keys, and everything going wrong. He was in the same position as her and you don't see him breaking down like that!

"There, there, Granger. Go run to Potty or Weasel or that other Weasley girl. Just don't slobber all over me." It was a good suggestion with insults added here and there.

Poor, insensitive, Malfoy. Hermione swished, swashed, and poked her wand in very complicated steps and screamed, "DENORIA!" It could knock people unconscious for two hours. She read all about it. She could of course knock him out for weeks or months even but even Crabbe and Goyle might get suspicious if they saw Malfoy not moving.

"Wingardium Leviosa," she muttered. Draco's unconscious body levitated. Hermione grudgingly dragged Draco's body under the Great Hall to where the kitchens were. Time to eat.

She came across a portrait and ticked a pear in the fruit bowl. It opened. The sight made her gasp. Over a hundred houselves were chatting happily which meant they're pleased. This sent a completely different message to Hermione.

"Look at you!" Hermione screeched, seeing the 'poor' creatures, "You all look so overworked and tired and your only happiness is when students are in their classes which meant you're not tirelessly cooking and feeding great lumps of empty-headed slobs! Oh! What did Dumbledore do to you! Oh goodness. Here's my hat and robe and socks and my gloves. Oh I have extra elf-hats in my pocket. And I can summon some more upstairs. _Accio Elf-hats!"_

Hermione threw pieces of clothes at houselves and the poor creatures were jumping and dodging and tumbling trying to help each other to not get hit by them.

"RUN!" screamed one of the house elves. The others scuttled out of sight as two dozen elf-hats came zooming though the portrait landing close to Hermione who threw them at houselves.

"No! He's been hit!" screamed another as a house elf fell down on the cold kitchen floor.

"Don't worry! That Potter Boy freed him a long time ago!"

"Keep running, she's throwing more hats and socks!" In a couple of seconds, the kitchen was cleared of houselves except for two: Dobby and Kreacher.

"Miss Hermione! Dobby is delighted to see you again! How's Harry Potter? Could you tell him Dobby said hi?" Dobby walked towards her picking hats and socks along his way and putting them on. "Dobby appreciates all the things you knit for houselves. But others is insulted by them. Dobby is been taking your hats, Miss Hermione. There are all warm and cozy; especially to Dobby's ears." Dobby wiggled his ears which were partially hidden by hats.

Hermione gasped. "You mean… no houselves have been freed in my years of S.P.E.W.?"

"There is three."

"That's IT?" she shrieked

"Mmmm…" Dobby didn't want to answer.

"How could this happen? Ohhh…" she groaned.

"Well…" Dobby said awkwardly, "Does Miss Hermione want some food?"

"Kreacher don't want to serve filthy blooded witches," mumbled Kreacher.

"Yes, Dobby, but I'll get it myself! Don't tire your poor hands preparing it!" Hermione stumped to a cupboard and snatched a variety of jams, bread and ham enough for two people. "I'll be happy to eat only these! And he," she pointed at Draco, "shall be too. He'd better be. I'll free those houselves even if it's the last thing I do." With that, Hermione stalked out of the kitchen, levitating Draco's unconscious body behind her.

Hermione sat close to the Great Hall entrance at 3:30 P.M. thinking.

Draco sat beside her hungrily jamming bread and ham into his mouth. Hermione released the knockout spell an hour early. She thought working with someone hungry would be harder than with someone full. With Draco finished fifteen minutes later, Hermione was getting drowsy. He poked her with the tip of his wand.

"What?"

"Where's your robe?"

"I freed houselves with it. Well… I tried."

"They're filthy creatures. They don't deserve freedom… OUCH! WHAT THE HECK!"

"Take that back! They're perfectly capable of thinking for themselves and they don't need us wizards and witches!"

**"Furnunculus!" **

**Hermione's body grew boils. "Densaugeo!" **

**Draco's teeth grew. "Stufefy! Stufefy! Ugh! Incendio!" **

**Hermione's on fire. "Finite Incantatem," she turned back to normal, "Serpensortia!" **

**"Don't shend my house fet on me! Finite Incantatem. Tarantallegra!" **

**"Petrificus Totalus!" Both students fell. An hour passed and they were still unconscious. Another hour passed and still frozen. The students were released from their last classes. **

**Harry and Ron were walking towards the Great Hall and stumbled upon the two. **

**"I have a vague idea of why they're lying like this. Finite Incantatem." **

**"Oh Ron! Harry! I'm so relieved you're back here! We were having a fight and Malfoy casted hexed me and we ended up being frozen and we've been lying here for hours!" Hermione hugged Harry and Ron, "I'm so glad you're both here to help me. I'm so lucky to have you two." She jabbered on and on about Malfoy being an inconsiderate hog and how she was the luckiest girl to have them as friends and all… **

**Two stomachs squirmed with guilt. **

**"So… Malfoy's frozen too, huh?" Ron said vainly, "Um…" he brought his foot down towards Malfoy's rib. There was a sickening crunch. **

**Harry kicked Malfoy's side. "That felt great." **

**"So, do we have to bring him to the Hospital Wing?" asked Hermione. **

**"I guess so," sighed Harry, "Well just tell Madam Pomfrey Peeves dropped a chandelier on him," he pointed at a chandelier, "Diffindo." It split open and crashed sending shards of broken glass and diamonds everywhere. **

**"AAAAAAAAAAAGH! Draco! POTTER! WEASLEY! GRANGER! YOU'LL PAY FOR THIS!" shrieked Pansy Parkinson who was walking around with her gang of Slytherins. She furiously produced a Stinging Hex and her gang followed. Soon, the trio and the Slytherins were sending sparks everywhere. **

**"HALT!" bellowed Snape who came running over when he heard the chandelier crash. Everything stopped. A Slytherin was in the middle of a curse, Pansy's friend were jabbing Harry with a wand, Ron was using a Shield Charm for another Slytherin's curse, Pansy was debating on whether to hex Hermione or not because she had Draco by her side. **

**Broken chandelier. Slytherins. Harry Potter. The brainy girl. His favorite student lying unconscious on the ground. It's all clear in Snape's mind. "FIFTY POINTS FROM GRYFFINDOR! POTTER! Take Draco to the hospital wing. Detention with Filch! Parkinson, stop your friend over there from obliterating Weasley," Snape was overwhelmed with the chaos, "NO, WAIT. ALL of you, detention with Filch when Draco gets out of the hospital. No words from anyone. Twenty more points from Gryffindor! I have some business to attend to! CLEAN THIS MESS UP!" **

**I hope that chapter doesn't deserve rotten tomatoes. Eh… sorry. I'm losing interest in the story again. –sigh- BUT I'LL Continue it. So far, I'm freestyling. I have no idea what to write next. Expect next chapter next year.**


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